Innovative Fictions since 1950

Innovative Fictions Since 1950

Good syllabus.

Christmas, no matter what good-intentioned people say, is really about getting lots of cool stuff for yourself!  A friend forwarded me the cool link above, and so I pass it on to you all, not in the spirit of seasonal giving, but in the spirit of Freeque's few readers receiving cool stuff that they can have just for themselves.

I forgot to turn the heater on last night; no worries, because I live in Southern California, in Perpetual Paradise.  We just opened all the windows in the house and let the eighty-degree weather warm the rooms from the outside.  I'm wearing frayed, faded denim shorts and ancient Birkenstock sandals today; my wife said she might go topless -- in her glorious buff above the waist -- I wouldn't blame her, and hope she does.  Merry Christmas!!  I'll happily bare my chest too, in bare man-boobs solidarity. I don't think the grandparents, especially our Tranny Granny, would mind. Obnoxious, nosy neighbors might peek through the saguaro cactus rising rather prickly above our back block wall, and call the cops on us for alleged indecent exposure.  Could become a very scary Christmas.  Cool.  Can't wait!

Tranny Granny wishes you all a scary Christmas
Christmas in Southern California.  Palm trees rustling in wicked Santa Anas.  Constant cobalt cloudless sky.  It's so bright we need sunglasses inside!  Santa Clause suffered second degree sunburn, I heard on the news this morning, and was late to several local chimneys; a seriously dehydrated Rudolph was rushed to the ER with heat exhaustion and sun stroke, and had to be hooked up to Corona Light I.Vs.  Frosty the Snowman's holiday itinerary doesn't even include the Southland.  He's such a wuss.

Snow and icicles are just things you see in Christmas cartoons -- in dreams, in crisp fantasy illusions -- when you tolerate er celebrate, Christmas in Southern California.


  1. I must confess having to look up "Lipogrammatic." I thought it had something to do with grammar that had too much fat. Damn, I would've loved to have sat in on that course. Great stuff.

    Hope you and yours had a meery xmas. Very jealous of your clemnent weather, as it has been very inclement here.

    By the way, give my best to Tranny Granny. And I must make another confession: I think I've got a crush on her! Very hot. Especially so since she could probably crush me.

  2. The Tranny Granny sends you her muscular love, Bubba! She chuckled when I shared your trepidation, which is justified I think, as she's quite the "wrastler," even in her golden years. She does "the warsh," I kid her. To her, people from Washington are from "Warshington". So endearing, to hear her talk.

    She helped turn me on to postmodernism in literature back in the day.

    Hope you've had a nice Christmas too, Bubba! I was thinking about the Baby Jesus today (hard not to on Christmas) but then I thought of you, reading your comment, and thought, why doesn't anybody ever talk about the Baby Satan or the Baby Lucifer or the Baby Beelzebub during the holidays? Maybe you and me could collaborate on a children's book together some time and amend that unfair oversight, and help bring some much needed balance back to Christmas.

  3. I love it! What a great idea!

    "Twas the night before Antichristmas, and all through the keep, not a demon was creeping, as they were having a nightmarishly good sleep..."

  4. That's the idea! Perhaps we should swiftly insert some copyright symbols into these posts in case we do do this, eh?


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